You lie..

This not the park at all!

Smooch My Pooch

Great fun from UStreamtv.
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What makes America so Great!

Voters can vote to pick up free stuff on Election Day

Coffee
Starbucks expects to hand out "hundreds of thousands" of free 12-ounce drip coffees (valued at about $1.75 each), says spokeswoman Jenny McCabe. "If everyone who votes comes in for a free cup of coffee, we'll have some lines," she says.

Doughnuts
Some 85 of Krispy Kreme's 231 locations in the U.S. will hand out star-shaped, red-white-and-blue sprinkled doughnuts "while supplies last," says spokesperson Dana Hughens. The chain will give out about 200,000 doughnuts valued at 99 cents each. "People are definitely talking about the brand as a result of this," she says.

Ice cream
Between 5 p.m. and 8 p.m. in each time zone, Ben & Jerry's ice cream shops will hand out single-scoop ice cream cones (a $3.40 value). "What better way to encourage people to be politically active than to give away free ice cream?" asks spokeswoman Liz Brenna.

Sandwiches
In a local market promotion, several hundred of the nation's 1,400 Chick-fil-A stores will hand out $2.70 chicken sandwiches to adults who show proof that they voted, says spokesman Jerry Johnston.

Stupid Daylight Savings

Why don't my dogs understand the concepts of "setting the clock back", and "sleeping later"?

How the Fight Started

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive.....so, I took her to a gas station..... and that's how the fight started....

I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And that's how the fight started.

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too'. And that's how the fight started.....

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' 'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And that's how the fight started.....

I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes yo u just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!' So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?' And that's how the fight started.....

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. 'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.' He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?' 'Nah, she can order for herself.' And that's how the fight started.....

Kazuhira Takeshita

Reminds me a little of Ralph Stanley..

In Case You Weren't Scared Enough

Palin on "Fruit Fly Research"

"Where does a lot of that earmark money end up, anyway? [...] You've heard about, um, these -- some of these pet projects they really don't make a whole lot of sense, and sometimes these dollars they go to projects having little or nothing to do with the public good. Things like fruit fly research in Paris, France. I kid you not!"

It's hard to know where to begin deconstructing this statement. This was a speech on autism, and Palin's critics have pounced on the fact that a recent study of Drosophila fruit flies showed that a protein called neurexin is essential for proper neurological function -- a discovery with clear implications for autism research.

Yá'át'ééh

Tony Hillerman, Novelist, Dies at 83 - NYTimes.com

Tony Hillerman, whose lyrical, authentic and compelling mystery novels set among the Navajos of the Southwest blazed innovative trails in the American detective story, died Sunday at Presbyterian Hospital in Albuquerque, The Associated Press reported.

We'll miss your wonderful novels, Tony! Yá'át'ééh

One lucky dog

Fishermen catch a DOG a mile out in North Sea.

Two fishermen were left reeling in surprise when they caught a DOG a mile out at sea.
At first when they spotted the animal swimming against the tide they thought it was an otter, but when they realised that it was a dog the two lifted him on board.
Freddie, a 14-year-old cairn terrier, was later reunited with his owner - who revealed that he dislikes water so much that he hates taking a bath and avoids walking through puddles.
He had become disorientated in the fog while on a walk with owner Jean Brigstock and had slipped into the water as the 73-year-old searched frantically for him.
And instead of swimming back to shore at Amble, Northumberland, he had mistakenly struck out for the deeps of the North Sea.
Mrs Brigstock said: 'It was a beautiful day, and I was taking him on his usual walk, but all of a sudden, a heavy sea fret set in quickly, and I couldn't see Freddie anymore.
'I looked for him for hours, and others helped. There was no sign of him, but I was convinced he would eventually turn up.'
She added: 'I was desperate. He's my companion and he's so important to me.
'I knew he hated water so I thought he'd head for the dunes rather than the sea. It really didn't enter my head that he would swim.
'He rarely goes through a puddle and has an aversion to baths.'
But Freddie was found three quarters of a mile out to sea after a long doggy paddle and was rescued by trawlermen Jimmy and Alan Thompson from Red Row, Northumberland.
A lifeboat was launched to collect the dog because their trawler was not yet due to return to shore.
By chance, Mrs Brigstock's daughter Wendy, who had taken over the search for Freddie, came across the wife of one of the fishermen, who told her they had found a dog.
Mrs Brigstock adopted Freddie as her own three years ago after his previous owner, a friend, went into a nursing home and was no longer able to look after him.
She said: 'He looked like a drowned rat when they found him.
'I'm so grateful to the two fishermen, the Coastguard and the inshore lifeboat men who took so much trouble to find him and take him to safety.'
Sea-dog Freddie, 14, is no worse for wear after his ordeal. He was taken to the vets but found to be unscathed.
Mrs Brigstock said: 'Freddie is back to his normal self. I'm not surprised he survived - he's a bit of a character really.
'The night he was rescued, he was a little bit under the weather. He was quite quiet and feeling sorry for himself. But the next morning he was ready for his breakfast.

Who's Nailin Paylin?

The first (SFW) minute of the latest porn spoof!

I'm Shocked, Shocked, I Say!

Palin has checkered history on ethics issues

ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, whose reformer image took a hit in a report concluding she abused her powers to settle a family score, has skirted state ethics rules before for personal benefit and used her office to help friends and supporters, according to an Associated Press review of records.

Palin mistakenly scolds her own supporters

Oops!

Palin was in the midst of blaming predatory lenders for the nationwide mortgage crisis when a large group of supporters in the rear of the crowd began demanding that someone turn up the volume on the event's speakers.

They chanted "Louder! Louder!" in unison, drawing the attention of other audience members, who began chanting "Sarah! Sarah!"

The vice presidential candidate apparently mistook them for some of the anti-war protesters that have disrupted some of her previous events.

"I would hope at least that those protestors have the courage and the honor of thanking our veterans for giving them the right to protest," Palin told them, drawing a roar from the crowd.

The great escape

This has been floating around for a bit, but just shows the tenacity of beagles.

Careful where you point that thing!

Those Canadian women are tough!!

Poor Ivy!

Ivy wants to go too!

PG Porn

When you like everything about porn.. except the sex!

Nailing Your Wife | Girls | SPIKE.com

Ralph Stanley Endorses Barack Obama

If he's good 'nuf for Ralph, he's sure good 'nuf for me!

Subject line of the Day

Upsize your hotdog into a French loaf

At Least I'm Not Alone

Millions spend half of income on housing (yahoo news)

...more than 7.5 million people — almost 15 percent of American homeowners with a mortgage — who are spending half of their income or more on housing costs, according to 2007 data released Tuesday by the U.S. Census Bureau. That is up from nearly 7.1 million the year before.

Michael Palin for President

John McCain picked the wrong Palin!

Fred. A Dogumentary Film

That dog has got mad skilz, yo!

Things to say during sex..

.. or not.

Get Out the Vote!

French Lesson Fail

see more fails

You just can't make this stuff up!

New York Prostitute With One Leg Dies After Being Knocked From Wheelchair

Christian the lion

This has been all over the interwebs lately, but it is really cool, so here's one more link to it!

Doing a Heck of a Job! (?)

Underground FEMA fuel tanks could leak:

WASHINGTON - The government owns hundreds of underground fuel tanks — many designed for emergencies back in the Cold War — that need to be inspected for leaks of hazardous substances that could be making local water undrinkable.

The Federal Emergency Management Agency has known since at least the 1990s that tanks under its supervision around the country could be leaking fuel into soil and groundwater, according to Associated Press interviews and research.

The agency knows of at least 150 underground tanks that need to be inspected for leaks, according to spokeswoman Debbie Wing. FEMA also is trying to determine by September whether an additional 124 tanks are underground or above ground and whether they are leaking.

The Paw of Doom

Don't be a Sheep

Via The Washington Post, Security Fix

LAS VEGAS, NEV. -- iPhones and other mobile devices with wireless access were among the top contributors to this year's "Wall of Sheep," a public shaming exercise debuting at the Black Hat security conference in Las Vegas this week that aims to educate people about the dangers of sending e-mail and other online communications over open wireless networks.

Conference organizers issued a clear warning to attendees: If you check your e-mail or communicate using the ubiquitous conference wireless network, be sure to do so over an encrypted connection (https:// versus http://). Otherwise, your credentials will be projected onto a wall where everyone will ridicule your seeming inability to grasp a fundamental tenet of online security.

Seen at the Blood Center...

A young pregnant woman bummin' a smoke & a lighter.
WTFBBQ?!

Crusin' in style

This shot was taken by a friend's wife in front of the bank where she works.
Looks like one happy dog!

We continue to fail our veterans

Soldier in famous photo never defeated 'demons' - Yahoo! News

PINEHURST, N.C. -
Officers had been to the white ranch house at 560 W. Longleaf many times before over the past year to respond to a "barricade situation." Each had ended uneventfully, with Joseph Dwyer coming out or telling police in a calm voice through the window that he was OK.
But this time was different.
The Iraq War veteran had called a taxi service to take him to the emergency room. But when the driver arrived, Dwyer shouted that he was too weak to get up and open the door.
The officers asked Dwyer for permission to kick it in.
"Go ahead!" he yelled.
They found Dwyer lying on his back, his clothes soiled with urine and feces. Scattered on the floor around him were dozens of spent cans of Dust-Off, a refrigerant-based aerosol normally used to clean electrical equipment.
Dwyer told police Lt. Mike Wilson he'd been "huffing" the aerosol.
"Help me, please!" the former Army medic begged Wilson. "I'm dying. Help me. I can't breathe."
Unable to stand or even sit up, Dwyer was hoisted onto a stretcher. As paramedics prepared to load him into an ambulance, an officer noticed Dwyer's eyes had glassed over and were fixed.
A half hour later, he was dead.

John McCain, a portrait...

Stupefaction Guaranteed!

The latest entry into my energy drink tryouts:
Stewie's Mind Erase Elixir, from Boston America.
While not amazingly great, it does pack a nice caffeine buzz with 120mg in 8.4 ounces! Along with 1000mg of Taurine, 50 mg of Inositol, 25 mg of Guarana, & 25mg of Ginseng.

Tastes just a little too much like Hawaiian Punch, though.

With a can like that, though, who can resist?

But does he like to be dipped in milk?

(CNN) — Longtime Washington talk-show host John McLaughlin is facing fire Monday for referring to Barack Obama as an "Oreo" during a segment on his Sunday political program, "The McLaughlin Group.

LoveChess

Bringing a whole new love of chess to teenage boys everywhere!

Lovechess Age of Egypt features:

• Advanced 3d sex animations system with diverse and interesting variations.
• Different sceneries, each with their own unique atmosphere.
• Multiplayer gamemodes. Play Lovechess online or through LAN against a human opponent.
• A beautiful 3D Egyptian scenery with hand painted erotic art and realistic characters.
• New and improved Chess-engine, to challenge both beginning as expert players.

Good to know..

Earth will not be gobbled up by black hole during big bang experiment, reassure scientists.

But we should stock up on snacks, just in case.

Guest Dog Update...

The guest dog we had at the end of last week got re-connected with his owner on Friday evening.
Unfortunately, she had to pick him up from the pound — it was just too much extra stress for the wife having him at the house.
About 30 minutes after she texted me to let me know that the county had picked him up, I got a call from the owner; I had put up posters all around two days earlier, but she had managed not to see them.
Since she was going to have to get him back from the county, it as going to cost her a few dollars, but I'm not sure how much. And since he wasn't wearing a rabies tag, there may have been a fine for that, as well, depending on whether or not she had his vaccination certificate to take with her.

I'm glad he's home, though, & hope that it spurs his owner on to get tags for him.

Guest Dog

So, I went to see what the dogs were barking at this morning, & found this guy wandering the neighborhood.
He appears to be a jack russell mix (maybe with a beagle?)
I took him to a vet nearby to see if he might have a microchip ID — no such luck, though. The vet thought he was maybe 2 ½ years old, & pretty healthy looking; the boys loved playing with him all day, & they all wore themselves out.
I left his description with Animal Control, in case anybody calls looking for him, & we put up a couple of fliers nearby. The wife took him for a walk around the neighborhood to see if anyone came out to say, “Hey, that's my dog!”, but no such luck.
She did meet a couple of people, though, who said that they thought this guy, & one other had been dropped off a few days ago in the neighborhood — we're near a university, & idiot students do that kind of thing all the time, I guess… .

When he started to get hungry this evening, he was a little naughty & made a grab for something that smelled tasty on a shelf — when I snapped at him a little, he shrunk back like a dog that had probably been hit before… How could anyone be like that with something so sweet?
Unfortunately, we really don't have the means to keep him, & may have to send him off to the pound tomorrow :-(
It absolutely doesn't help that I think he's adorable.

I gotta get cable!

VIENNA (Reuters) - Whether it has any bearing on Monday's crunch Euro 2008 match between the two countries is debatable but Austria drew first blood on Sunday when their topless women's soccer team beat Germany 10-5.

True Love?

Due South BBQ

The New River Valley's only real Pit Cooked BBQ... follow the smoke to the real thing.

A co-worker mentioned Due South to me recently; I can't believe they've been in the area for this long, & I hadn't tried it.
Killer barbecue, and they serve breakfast seven days a week!

I can't remember the last time I made such heartfelt yummy noises based solely on the scents getting into my nose. For someone who grew up used to Eastern Carolina style BBQ, it was insane goodness.
Each order comes with a choice of three of their five varieties of heaven sauce:

• Hot Red – 1st Place 2007 Va. State Championship
  Tomato Base, warm, slightly sweet.
• Sweet Red – Tomato Base, sweet & tangy
• Lexington – Vinegar Base, spicy
• Yellow – Mustard Base, sweet & tangy
• Sweet Brown – Tomato base, dark and sweet

The Lexington has a heart rendering goodness, and the Hot Red was very tasty as well; the Sweet Red was just a little too sweet for my taste, but still pretty good.
Next time — you'd better believe there's going to be a next time — I'll have to try the Yellow & the Sweet Brown, though I may end up buying the Lexington by the quart.

Stimulate this!

Like many Americans, we're awaiting the arrival of our stimulus check... . All $4.36 of it!

Seems the Treasury Department feels that it's in our best interest that they take the rest of what we've been paying monthly for our 2006 taxes, instead of letting us actually use the stimulus check for something important, say... paying down our debt?


Who am I kidding, this Administration doesn't know squat about paying down debt... .

It turns out that quite a few states are also taking part in this offset program. And it turns out that a lot of people are pretty pissed about it, too.

The real test will be next month, when the IRS is not supposed to withdraw any money from my bank account to continue our repayment schedule, which was working just fine for us, BTW.

R.I.P

We lost this guy last night to a passing car going too fast for our residential street.
He was a sweet guy who found us last fall, & has been dining on our front porch.
We kept saying that we need to get him fixed & find a home for him, but never were able to find a place for him.

We'll miss you, bud.

Who Expects The Spanish Inquisition

more graph humor and song chart memes

Things I may say to myself

more graph humor

Children Can Send Marriage Into Downward Spiral

File this under things we already knew.

Florida, Land of Idiots?

LAND 'O LAKES, Fla. -- A substitute teacher in Pasco County has lost his job after being accused of wizardry.

Teacher Jim Piculas does a magic trick where a toothpick disappears and then reappears.

Piculas recently did the 30-second trick in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land 'O Lakes.

Piculas said he then got a call from the supervisor of teachers, saying he'd been accused of wizardry.

"I get a call the middle of the day from head of supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue, you can't take any more assignments you need to come in right away,'" he said.

Piculas said he did not know f any other accusations that would have led to the action.

The teacher said he is concerned that the incident may prevent him from getting future jobs.

Goose Throwdown

That's one pissed off goose!

More Schrodinger

Waiting..

For Mom.
I'm sure she'll bring treats!

Words to live by

"A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history–with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila."

(Mitch Radcliffe)

Somethin' I can do for you?

Ever wonder..

Why it's called Yellowstone?

Geico Collections Agent

Hillary Says She 'Misspoke' About Wrestling Bin Laden

Courtesy of The Huffington Post

Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, who has been accused in recent days of padding her foreign policy resume while First Lady, admitted today that she may have exaggerated about an encounter she said she had with al-Qaeda terror mastermind Osama bin Laden in 1998.

In an appearance on NBC's Meet the Press on Sunday, Sen. Clinton told host Tim Russert, "I wrestled bin Laden in his cave in 1998 and had him pinned to the ground before the bastard got away."

But a review of Sen. Clinton's official White House schedule from that period revealed that the then-First Lady was nowhere in the vicinity of Mr. bin Laden on that day, but was instead greeting a group of honor roll students at Disney World in Orlando.

"I may have misspoke about what went on that particular day," Sen. Clinton said today. "But it was a very busy time for me, what with having that knife-fight with Kim Jong-Il and all."

Reporters peppered Sen. Clinton's new press spokesman with questions about another purported exploit of hers, in which the senator claimed that she and a ragtag team of blue-collar drillers deflected an asteroid on a collision course with the Earth.

"Everything Hillary Clinton says is true," said her new spokesman, the author James Frey.

Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com.

Abs of Steel

From The Joy of Tech:

It's a team effort

Des chatons s'amusent avec le papier toilette - Video

Partial conversations...

As I entered the elevator yesterday, heading out from work, two guys got off on our floor.
As the door closed, I heard one of them tell the other, "They keep the baby delivering machines down in the basement."

I may not know what a baby delivering machine is, but I'm pretty sure that we don't have any in our offices.

Big Brother Cast Member Fired Over Autism "Retards" Comment

It's good to see the United Autism Foundation taking this stand & doing the right thing.

From the New York Post:

THE "Big Brother" contestant who stirred up a controversy when he called autistic children "retards," has been fired from his job.

But Adam Jasinski, who worked for the United Autism Foundation, doesn't know he's been canned.

He is sequestered in the "Big Brother" house in LA, cut off from contact with the outside world, in keeping with the show's rules.

The foundation announced his firing on its Web site yesterday.

At least one advertiser (Lowes) pulled out of the show following the public outcry over the crude remark and several autism groups even called for CBS to cancel the reality series because producers chose to air the remark in an edited version of the program.

Desktop Zen - Reducing Visual Clutter on your (PC) Desktop

I found this to be an inspiring piece, even if it is almost two years old.

The idea being to go from this:

to something more like this:

Guess that locks up the Pregnancy/Cravings vote!

Ben & Jerry's founders endorse Obama

BURLINGTON, Vt. - The founders of Ben & Jerry's endorsed Barack Obama on Monday, and lent his Vermont campaign two "ObamaMobiles" that will tour the state and give away scoops of "Cherries for Change" ice cream.
If there was ever a need for real change, and if there ever was a candidate to inspire us and make that happen, it's now," said Ben Cohen.
Added Jerry Greenfield: "Barack is showing that when you lead with your values and follow what you have inside that good things will happen."
Echoing Obama, Greenfield said he and Cohen succeeded when they opened their ice cream shop 30 years ago in Burlington by doing things differently, instead of copying the "tired ways" of doing business.
"What we saw is that when you want real change it's not a marketing slogan. You have to do things differently. And that is not going to be done by someone who's been involved in the system for years and years," Greenfield said. "It needs to come from inside and Barack Obama has it."
Sen. Patrick Leahy, D-Vt., and his wife joined the ice cream duo to announce their radio campaign backing the Illinois senator.
Cohen initially supported John Edwards, who dropped out of the race earlier this month.
Rob Hill, director of the Vermonters for Obama campaign, said he looked forward to getting behind the wheel of one of the two ObamaMobiles — retrofitted Honda Elements.

And people will be eating Ben & Jerry's at campaign headquarters, either to celebrate their victory, or to smother their depression!

US Humane Society to honor boy who died saving pets

NEW YORK (AFP) -

The Humane Society of the United States, the leading US animal welfare organization, is to honor a New York boy who died last year after going back into his blazing home to rescue his pets.
The organization was to present the Circle of Compassion award on Saturday to Thomas and Maria Monahan, whose nine-year-old son Tommy was overcome by smoke last December after trying to save his pet dog, lizard and fish.
The award recognizes and honors individuals who have performed an act of significant courage or compassion to assist an animal in need.
Tommy and his family initially escaped from the fire in their New York home. "But when Tommy realized that his beloved pets were still inside, he broke away from his mother and ran back into the flames," the society said.
"An avid lover of animals and nature, he did what was in his heart and tried to rescue the animals who were so dear to him," it added.
The organization did not say whether any of the animals survived the blaze.

How many of us would have acted quickly & selflessly for our companion animals?
I think that we all would want to, but as "grown ups" would have stopped to weigh the consequences of our actions, & perhaps thought twice, or thrice, about running into the danger.

Evolution, anyone?

What do the non-evolutionist candidates say about things like this?

Meet Lisa the geep... a cross between a goat and a sheep.
She was born after an unscheduled amorous encounter on the farm of Klaus Exsternbrink, in Schwerte, in northern Germany's Ruhr Valley. One of his young billy goats leapt over a fence and had a passionate liaison with a ewe.

Study: Biofuels Can Be Bad

More evidence is piling up that biofuels may not be the boon to energy resources that they've been touted to be.

In recent years, studies have pointed out several potential problems with using biofuels, such as ethanol, as energy sources. Some research has indicated it may take more energy to make the ethanol than it would ultimately provide as a fuel. Some types of ethanol when burned may not cut down on the release of greenhouse gases as much as was hoped. And devoting more land to growing biofuel crops can strain water resources, other studies have found.

The gist of the studies seem to be that the creation of most biofuels takes more energy than it saves, that the clearing of land for plant resources releases large amounts of carbon into the atmosphere... .

And let's not forget how much food prices have gone up, at least in the USA, due to the higher demand for ethanol (primarily from corn), & it's higher cost (Thanks, GW).

Another human rights breakthrough!

In a legal breakthrough, a court in Stockholm has ruled that Swedish lesbians cannot be stopped from buying puppies.

The victory for equal puppy rights came in the appeals court, which upheld an earlier ruling which awarded damages to a lesbian who was refused service when trying to buy a puppy at a kennel.
The woman had been trying to buy a puppy at the kennel in Värmdö, a suburb of Stockholm, after the kennel owner had placed an advert in the paper. Things all seemed to be going well – until the woman mentioned that she and her partner would have plenty of time to care for the dog.
It emerged that the woman's partner was also a woman, at which point the kennel owner (another woman) called the sale off, The Local reports.
The kennel owner explained that this was because she didn't trust homosexuals, because she'd read that transvestites were connected to animal pornography. Which doesn't mae any sense, but there you go.
The puppyless lesbian reported the case to HomO, the Swedish Ombudsman against Discrimination on Grounds of Sexual Orientation, which sent the case to the courts.
The confused anti-lesbian kennel owner has now been ordered to pay £1,580 (20,000 kronor) in damages, and £3,560 (45,000 kronor) in HomO's legal fees.

What a let down.

They say you hurt the ones you love.
Well, I've been hurt.
I have a mouse in the kitchen...

And I have nine cats.
So, yeah, I've been hurt.

Catcam Fritz

My name is Fritz and I live at 23 Cat Street. My mistress is an artist, and now it's my turn to show what I can do. Since September 2007 we've owned a Mr-Lee-Catcam — bought as a kit and assembled by Thomi and DuD.

Check out Fritz's gallery to see all of the places he's been around town!

It gets worse?

Marriage: It's Only Going to Get Worse

If your spouse already bugs you now, the future is bleak. New research suggests couples view one another as even more irritating and demanding the longer they are together… .

Swede Kicks Bichon Frisé to Death

Can you believe this guy?
And that he's claiming self-defense?

Swede Kicks Bichon Frisé to Death
January 15, 2008
Unfortunately, even violence takes place against dogs here in Sweden. Aftonbladet reports this evening that a Bichon Frisé called Ronja was kicked to death by a 51-year-old man who claims he acted in self-defense.
The incident occurred earlier this summer in a holiday area called Grovstanäs, just north of Stockholm.
11-year-old Bichon Frisé Ronja and 9-month-old pup Findus were playing about on the lawn outside Cecilia Lindqvist and Morgan Svensson’s cottage.
An unnamed 51-year old male approached with his own dog, a dalmatian. Findus, ran out to the road and barked at the man.
According to Morgan Svensson the man ordered him to control his dogs and threated to kick them if he didn’t or set his own dog on them.
Ronja then came down to the road to investigate. Svensson told the man to leave his property but the man kicked Ronja in the stomach, kicking her into the air before leaving.
Svensson acted promptly, putting Ronja in his car and driving to the vet.
“But she died on the way. She looked at me and then closed her eyes,” Svensson told Aftonbladet.
The 51-year-old is now being charged with animal cruelty. He denies the charge, instead, claiming he acted in self-defense and was only trying to protect himself and his dog.
Source: Aftonbladet

High heels 'improve sex life'

This just in:
High heels 'improve sex life'

Wearing higher heels may improve women's sex life, according to an Italian doctor.
Dr Maria Cerruto says 2ins high heels can help improve pelvic floor muscles, reports the BBC.
Dr Cerruto, a urologist and self-professed lover of high heels, set out to prove they were not as bad for women's health as some suggest.
Her study of 66 women under 50 found those who held their foot at a 15 degree angle to the ground - the equivalent of a two inch heel - had as good posture as those who wore flat shoes.
And, crucially, they showed less electrical activity in their pelvic muscles suggesting they were at an optimum position, which could improve their strength and ability to contract.
Pelvic floor muscles assist sexual performance and satisfaction, and also provide vital support to the pelvic organs, which include the bladder, bowels and uterus.
But they often weaken after pregnancy and childbirth, and as women get older.
Dr Cerruto said: "Women often have difficulty in carrying out the right exercises for the pelvic zone and wearing heels could be the solution.
"Like many women, I like high-heeled shoes," she added. "It's good to know they have potential health benefits."

That must be why all the girls keep them on in porn movies... .

Blue Sky's

I remember trying one of these a while back & liking it, so when I saw the 8 oz. can for under $2.00, I grabbed one.

And it holds up pretty well.
The flavor is a generic berry taste, with just a little zing to it.
Ingredients:

• FILTERED CARBONATED WATER
• SUCROSE
• GLUCOSE
• CITRIC ACID
• NATURAL FLAVORS
• TAURINE
• SODIUM CITRATE
• GRAPE SKIN EXTRACT (COLOR)
• GINSENG EXTRACT
• L-CARNITINE
• NATURAL CAFFEINE
• ASCORBIC ACID
• NIACINAMIDE [B3]
• SODIUM CHLORIDE
• INOSITOL
• GLUCURONOLACTONE
• PYRIDOXINE HCI [B6]
• RIBOFLAVIN [B2]
• MALTODEXTRIN
• CYANOCOBALAMIN [B12].

They score extra points for using sucrose & glucose (instead of corn syrup), & for using a natural source of caffeine (probably the kola nut).
At 90mgs, the caffeine level is a little low compared to most energy drinks, which come in around 135 to 200mgs.
In that regard, it's more like a good strong cup of coffee, but with the added B vitamins to get the brain going.

I'd have to say it's a close second to the Sobe Adrenalin Rush for me.

But does it taste like chicken?

Presenting the Elephant-shrew.

This undated handout photo from the California Academy of Sciences received January 31 shows a rare new species of mammal, a shrew-like creature called a grey-faced sengi, living in a small community in remote Tanzania. Sengis -- small, furry, insect-eating mammals that live on forest floors -- are also called elephant-shrews.
(AFP/California Academy of Sciences/Francesco Rovero)

Words to live by...

In my spam....

Get a new huge colossal rod by clicking here

Us vs Them

Sasha Cohen: I Am a Fucking Olympian, Dickwad

Midwestern man, about woman spinning in center of ice rink: Awww, someone's reflecting on times passed.
New Yorker: Look at that chick in the middle -- thinks she's a fuckin' Olympian! [Yells at her] Nice work, retard!

--Rockefeller Center

via Overheard in New York, Jan 29, 2008

Something new...

This has been taunting me at the local Gas Station for a while now, so I thought I'd give it a try, instead of my usual Sobe Adrenaline Rush.
Upshot is a 2.5 ounce energy drink with 200mg caffeine — sounds good... .
Okay.. took me more thatn five minutes just to get the bottle open — that's not a good sign.

Flavor: Mocha
Ingredients: Proprietary Methylxanthine Blend - PytoXan (Proprietary blend of plant-based methylxanthines-Caffiene, Theobromine, Theophyline, from Guarana Seed extract, Green Tea extract, Kola Nut extract and USP caffeine anahydrous)
Other Ingredients: Water, Liquid Sucrose, El Salvadorian Coffee Extract, Chocolate Extract, Vanilla, Natural Flavors, Natural Gums, Citric Acid, Potassium Sorbate (to preserve flavor).

Smell:
Like a chocolaty NyQuil (hmmm....)

Since it's only 2.5 ounces, it's gonna go down quickly (also because of the NyQuil thing...

Note to self, "Don't buy this again!"

I can't quite describe the taste.. maybe like the cheapest chocolate liqueur available in the third world, & the conveyor belt at the factory must go past bags of coffee beans, so it that gets an idea of what it's supposed to taste of.

Live and Learn!

Update: It may taste pretty bad, but it definitely got the job done, & I am just bouncing off the walls!
But I stil won't buy it again. Maybe it should be labeled, "For emergency use only."

Question of the Day

If your health insurance covers check ups,
why doesn't your car insurance cover oil changes?

The atheist's nightmare: the banana

These guys are way on out there.. Probably Huckabee supporters!

From the Youtube page:

Kirk Cameron learns why the design of such a well-thought-out fruit PROVES that 'God' is responsible for all of creation. Surely He made the banana with humans in mind. Surely He wanted us to drink daquiris, too.
Also, how does this guy explain the artichoke?

Headline of the Day

Hot Shooting Tide Women Beat 'Cocks!

Man Leaves Toddler In Van, Goes To Strip Club

You wouldn't want him to take the kid in, would you?

MAPLEWOOD, Minn. -- Prosecutors in Wisconsin are considering charges after a Twin Cities man allegedly left his 1½-year-old son in a van outside a strip club for several hours... .

Loans that change lives

Kiva lets you connect with and loan money to unique small businesses in the developing world. By choosing a business on Kiva.org, you can "sponsor a business" and help the world's working poor make great strides towards economic independence. Throughout the course of the loan (usually 6-12 months), you can receive email journal updates from the business you've sponsored. As loans are repaid, you get your loan money back.

And we're off to a wonderful start here in the U.S.

A sampling of headlines from FoxNews.com this evening:

• Arizona Beauty Queen Charged With Kidnapping, Torturing Ex-Boyfriend
• Colorado Police Arrest Suspect in Single Bullet Killing of Woman, Girl at New Year's Eve Party
• U.S. Navy Sailors Found Dead in Ghana Hotel Room
• Two Tennessee Teens Charged With Fatally Shooting Foster Mother
• Manhunt for Father Suspected of Killing Teen Girls
• Illinois Man Accused of Setting Apartment Fire That Killed Pregnant Daughter, Her Family

Gonna be a banner year!